الجو الرخيص دا “El-gaw el ra5ees da“ Not, as you may guess, in reference to the scorching Cairene summer or harsh and perpetually un-heated winter. The only translation I can think of is something like, ‘and all that bullshit,’ but the phrase in Arabic isn’t vulgar. An example: Couples get engaged early عشان الناس ما بيقولوش حاجة والجو الرخيص دا = so people don’t talk about them and all that bullshit. ‘Unpleasantness’ is the general meaning. ...

UPDATE: It has come to light that the phrase يضرب عشرة (lit. ‘hit ten’ and a common Egyptian euphemism for masturbation) only, apparently, applies to men. For women, the equivalent euphemism is تضرب سبعة ونص or ‘hit seven and a half.’ Many questions have emerged in light of this discovery, including but not limited to: Why do men get more what I presume to be fingers than women? [I believe the answer we’re looking for here is ‘patriarchy’ but if there’s a reason a bit more specific than that, THE PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW.] Why do men even need both hands? Doesn’t that seem frivolous to you? Why half a finger? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? What are the other two and a half busy with while this is going down? Ugh. Arabic, your mysteries are boundless. ...

مستذئب “mosta2dheb“ Literally means: ‘He who seeks to be a wolf.’ If you weren’t previously convinced that Form X is the most glorious of all verb forms, I’m preeeeeeeeeetty sure you are now. 

BREAKING: #TeamMaha has received reports that one Facebook user has seen the actress who played Al-Kitab’s “Maha” multiple times over the past year in the Heliopolis neighborhood of Cairo, Egypt. The woman claimed that she often sees “Maha” out with her family, asserting that the actress does not, contrary to the expectations of many, seem particularly lonely. A large number of American Arabic students familiar with “Maha” have been under the impression for many years that the actress was killed in a fiery car crash soon after the textbook was published. As a result, the news may come as a shock to some. ...

يخرب بيت حلاوتك “ya5rab bayt 7elawtek” The game spit by this aspiring Romeo actually means something roughly like, “Screw your hotness!” Let’s go ahead and break that one down because it makes approximately zero fucking sense. يخرب بيتك (literally “May God destroy your house”—the full phase is actually الله يخرب بيتك) is basically the lowest vulgarity grade you can get for wishing someone harm. If someone bumps into you on the street and you don’t want to start a fight, that’s a good one to mutter quietly under your breath, if you feel the need. “Screw you” may be the most accurate translation. حلاوة means ‘sweetness,’ but is also used to refer to how attractive a woman is. ...

Many of you have been asking a very profound question regarding the name of this blog: “I don’t get it. Who’s Maha?” And this is something that I’ll admit I should have addressed from the get-go. To answer this question, I could list for you all the conventionally important biographical facts about Maha, like how she is a character in the book (it is literally called ‘the book:’ Al-Kitab) used for Arabic language education in America. I could tell you that Maha is a Palestinian-Egyptian woman living in the United States, that her father works as a translator with the UN, and that her grandfather was an army officer. I could also tell you that Maha admits on camera that she often feels lonely, that she is jealous of her friend Leila’s pool, and even hints that she is wistfully in love with her first cousin. ...

مالكش دعوة “malaksh da3wa“ Very often means, “This is none of your business.” Ex: If you try to step in on an argument between two best friends, one of them might tell you to bug off by saying what literally translates to, “YOU DO NOT HAVE AN INVITATION!!!” But it can also serve another meaning: for example, if someone tries to blame you for a copyediting mistake at work that wasn’t actually in your purview, you could say “malish da3wa bmodo3 el copyediting” = lit. “I don’t have an invitation for the subject of copyediting” = “Copyediting is not my responsibility.” ...

هي ناقصة “hya na2esa“ Means something like, “I ALREADY HAVE ENOUGH PROBLEMS WTF LIFE ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW. ARE YOU SERIOUS.” Said in exasperation when you’ve been having a horrendous day and then that one last thing happens that makes you want to shake your fist at the heavens. Regardless of gender, everyone says ‘hya.’ I have absolutely no insight as to why.

انا ماشي جمب الحيط “ana mashy gemb el 7ayt“ Means something like, “I’m keeping to myself / not taking sides.” No joke, my amiya teacher taught this to the entire class before June 30 and instructed us all to say this whenever anyone asked about politics. Was also essential knowledge for the rest of that summer when taxi drivers wanted to play the “c**p or revolution?!” game. Phrase has since been replaced by a couple of enthusiastic “TEHYA MASR!!!”‘s. ...

كنا في سيرتك “konna fi seertak” (to a male) aka, “We were just talking about you” Also تجيبش سيرتي في الموضوع = “DO NOT BRING MY BIOGRAPHY IN THE SUBJECT” = roughly “Don’t bring me up”