Egyptian Arabic

وشك حلو علي “weshak 7elo alaya“ Actually means, “You bring me luck.” So that’s a thing.

If you want to communicate effectively with Egyptian friends, you’re going to have to know how to properly disparage, praise, and express tepid enthusiasm about events and people. In Egyptian, the three main words you’ll need to do this literally translate to “balls” “cream” and “solid.” -The word بيضان (‘beydan’) comes from a slang term for testicles (which, incidentally, literally means eggs) and is used to say that something is lame. As in, الحفلة بيضان – The party is lame. Sometimes when someone that you’re out with is being annoying or difficult, I’ve heard friends say ايه البيضان دا which literally translates to ‘what is this ballsness.’ Go ahead and put that one in your back pocket for later. ...

UPDATE: It has come to light that the phrase يضرب عشرة (lit. ‘hit ten’ and a common Egyptian euphemism for masturbation) only, apparently, applies to men. For women, the equivalent euphemism is تضرب سبعة ونص or ‘hit seven and a half.’ Many questions have emerged in light of this discovery, including but not limited to: Why do men get more what I presume to be fingers than women? [I believe the answer we’re looking for here is ‘patriarchy’ but if there’s a reason a bit more specific than that, THE PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW.] Why do men even need both hands? Doesn’t that seem frivolous to you? Why half a finger? WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? What are the other two and a half busy with while this is going down? Ugh. Arabic, your mysteries are boundless. ...

BREAKING: #TeamMaha has received reports that one Facebook user has seen the actress who played Al-Kitab’s “Maha” multiple times over the past year in the Heliopolis neighborhood of Cairo, Egypt. The woman claimed that she often sees “Maha” out with her family, asserting that the actress does not, contrary to the expectations of many, seem particularly lonely. A large number of American Arabic students familiar with “Maha” have been under the impression for many years that the actress was killed in a fiery car crash soon after the textbook was published. As a result, the news may come as a shock to some. ...

يخرب بيت حلاوتك “ya5rab bayt 7elawtek” The game spit by this aspiring Romeo actually means something roughly like, “Screw your hotness!” Let’s go ahead and break that one down because it makes approximately zero fucking sense. يخرب بيتك (literally “May God destroy your house”—the full phase is actually الله يخرب بيتك) is basically the lowest vulgarity grade you can get for wishing someone harm. If someone bumps into you on the street and you don’t want to start a fight, that’s a good one to mutter quietly under your breath, if you feel the need. “Screw you” may be the most accurate translation. حلاوة means ‘sweetness,’ but is also used to refer to how attractive a woman is. ...

Many of you have been asking a very profound question regarding the name of this blog: “I don’t get it. Who’s Maha?” And this is something that I’ll admit I should have addressed from the get-go. To answer this question, I could list for you all the conventionally important biographical facts about Maha, like how she is a character in the book (it is literally called ‘the book:’ Al-Kitab) used for Arabic language education in America. I could tell you that Maha is a Palestinian-Egyptian woman living in the United States, that her father works as a translator with the UN, and that her grandfather was an army officer. I could also tell you that Maha admits on camera that she often feels lonely, that she is jealous of her friend Leila’s pool, and even hints that she is wistfully in love with her first cousin. ...

مالكش دعوة “malaksh da3wa“ Very often means, “This is none of your business.” Ex: If you try to step in on an argument between two best friends, one of them might tell you to bug off by saying what literally translates to, “YOU DO NOT HAVE AN INVITATION!!!” But it can also serve another meaning: for example, if someone tries to blame you for a copyediting mistake at work that wasn’t actually in your purview, you could say “malish da3wa bmodo3 el copyediting” = lit. “I don’t have an invitation for the subject of copyediting” = “Copyediting is not my responsibility.” ...

!حلو قوي زي العسل. يا سلام يا قشطة “7elo awi, zay el 3asl. ya salam, ya 2eshta!“ Actual thing that was literally said to me once by a real person (I think).

يضرب عشرة “yadrab ashara“ To masturbate. #Sorry #NotSorry

أنتي ساكنة في الدقي؟ “Enty sakina fil do2i?“ Smoother translation: Do you live in Dokki? In Egyptian colloquial Arabic, verbs are often replaced with a structure called the ‘Ism Fa3l,’ a concept that I like to call a ‘Verbal Noun.’ For example, when we want to ask the question ‘do you understand?’ instead of using a verb as you would in MSA (هل تفهم؟), it’s more common in Egyptian colloquial to employ the ism fa3l (فاهم؟ – Are you an understander?) and drop the هل because هل is for squares. ...